Part of your world

“I like drinking coffee alone and reading alone. I like riding the bus alone and walking home alone. It gives me time to think and set my mind free. I like eating alone and listening to music alone. but when I see a mother with her child, a girl with her lover, or a friend laughing with their best friend, I realise that even though I like being alone, I don’t fancy being lonely. The sky is beautiful, but the people are sad. I just need someone who won’t run away.”

Sitting here writing this year's last blog post feels a little weird when I think about it. Another year of my surprisingly short life has almost passed by and what have I been doing? This year has not been the best to be honest but it just makes the others even better. Sometimes we have to feel shit to feel awesome.

I'm not really a person who wants to start a completely new life in every January but something has to change. I love trying new things but I easily get stuck with the old ones. In January I will begin Japanese lessons in an open university which is exciting and hopefully it's going to be challenging and fun. My dad has already promised to take me to Japan for a holiday when I handle the language well enough. Definitely motivating me to study hard!

The camera situation is getting solved, eventually. I'm probably going to get a new camera soon which is super cool. I already tried it at the camera shop and it's quite small but much better than my old one. I can't wait to take photos with it! #technologyfreak

I copied this thingy from Jemina's blog and thought it'd be fun to try to recall some highlights of the past year.

1. How did you spend the New Year's eve in 2010?

I hung out with a friend and fell asleep quite early. Didn't really do anything special.

2. Did you date someone during the past year?

I didn't...

3. Did you travel?

Yes! I went to Italy with my family for a couple days but would've wanted to travel a little more.

4. Did you have a summer job?

Nope. And I still loathe the people of the local market for bitching and lying ugh.

5. What was your biggest achievement this year?

Staying alive.

6. Did something make you disappointed?

Yes, the weather. Summer was too hot and this winter is just so depressing and lame.

7. The best memory of the year?

That summer night when I sneaked out to take photos, and the moments spent with my friends.

8. The best piece of clothing you found?

Inexpensive cheap monday jeans x 3. I really don't know what I would be wearing if I didn't have them.

9. Favourite clothes of the year?

Probably some cheap ass h&m cardigan.

10. Did you get a tattoo?

No. But hopefully will get one soon!

11. Did you move somewhere?

No, but I would have loved to.

12. Did you make any new friends?

Yes I did!

13. The best party of the year?

Me and my best friend at her place in Tampere. Just us two pulling a semi all-nighter on a wednesday night. Going to school on the following day.

14. The worst party of the year?

Some boring school 'party' I was forced to attend.

15. What do you remember of the year 2011?

Lots of loneliness, new blogger friends. ♥

16. The cutest thing you saw?

I honestly can't say.

17. The most beautiful day of the year?

The day I went skiing with my sister.

18. Did you make any clothes by yourself?

No. But I can't understand why! I really want to make a t-shirt with my own print in 2012.

19. The best memory of school?

Japanese lessons! All the other school memories are proper bad.

20. Did you get something you had wanted for a long time?

Not really.

21. What did you do to your hair?

Dyed it multiple times. I was a blonde, a bit more natural blonde, a redhead and a brunette with a pink spot.

22. Did you lose something?

Does losing a friend count?

23. The best shoes you bought in 2011?

Converse shoes!

24. What tv shows did you watch?

Desperate housewives, Skins and some Korean dramas.

25. *insert a question about driving a car*

Musta tuntuu että ojaan ajaminen on aika suomalainen sanonta, mutta en tosiaan ajanut ojaan haha.

26. Did you get a new phone?

No! But I will get a new one in 2012. I'm so sick of this laggy Nokia right now.

27. Your favourite shop of the year?

For clothing, Weekday and JC. For food I prefer the nearest Siwa (a mini-sized food market) which I visited quite often...

28. Did you go to movies?

Yes, but only roughly five times or so. It's so expensive!!

29. Did you get a seasonal affective disorder?

Not really. I just hate the darkness in general.

30. What are you waiting to happen in 2012?

I want to make new friends, travel somewhere, advance my Japanese skills, get a driving license, buy more DVDs, hug all of my friends and go to a Korean restaurant in Helsinki.

See you next year!

the owl and the tanager

Hobbies: taking random photos when you don't anything else to do

You know what guys. I just fucking broke my dslr's screen. My beloved baby is hurt. And I'm afraid it's going to be way too expensive to repair. Well, I still can take photos with it but I can take a look at them only when I upload them to my laptop. But today I'm gonna take the camera to the shop I bought it from and see what can be done. If the screen is going to be repaired, I'm probably gonna be without any camera for weeks. I'm seriously going to die. /rant

Last night we came back home from a cruise which was okay but would've been much funnier if I was 18 already. There's nothing to do for people of my age if you don't have a fake ID or your sister's driving license with you so yeah. I bought 10 cans of Lipton ice tea because I love it too much and can't buy it here.

By the way, still no snow here. I want to go downhill skiing though I only do it like once a year since I usually hate it. Idk, I'm a diffucult person.

I've got quite a many questions about coding, html, css and photo editing lately, and thought that if you sent me some questions about them now, I could answer you with a big answer post! I love to help people to make their blog templates and photos more advanced and unique but answering to the same questions all the time isn't that fun really. So now, ask me and I'll answer you! I'll do my best and share all the secrets I have lol. Just because I love you !!!

It's not beginning to look like christmas

Real tree or artificial? The real deal even though when I was smaller I couldn't live near a real tree because of my allergy so we always had an artificial one and I kinda got used to it.
Foil or wrapping paper or gift bags? Does someone use foil for gifts?
When do you put up the tree? In December before Christmas - depends a lot. This year we put it up on the 23rd which is probably the latest ever in my life.
How is the tree decorated? With lights and some ornaments, this year we tried to keep it more simple ( = my little sister wasn't allowed to decorate).
When do you take the tree down? In January unless the tree's making a big mess already earlier after Christmas.
Do you like eggnog? I've never tasted it, sounds quite horrible to be honest. All I can imagine is a drinkable omelet.
Favorite gift received as a child? Oh a hard one. Probably some lego stuff, I was crazy about them.
Hardest person to buy for? Some of my friends / school buddies I really don't know that well.
Easiest person to buy for? My sister and the rest of my family.
Worst Christmas gift you ever received? I think I haven't got anything that bad. I appreciate every gift I get.
Mail or e-mail Christmas cards? I'm too old-fashioned for e-mail Christmas cards. Favorite Christmas Movie? Uh I have no idea. The Holiday? It's Christmas movie to me at least.
When do you start shopping for Christmas? In December - starting earlier would be horrible because I want to give the gifts right away when I buy them.
Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? No, who does that omg.
Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Salad? Or chocolate. I hate the traditional Finnish Christmas foods.
Clear lights or colored on the tree? Both look nice! We always have clear lights though.
Favorite Christmas song? This stupid but beautiful song called Jouluyön hymni. My friend sang it at my school's Christmas party and I loved it.
Travel for Christmas or stay at home? Never travelled but I'd love it.
Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? They're nameless to me.
Angel on the tree top or a star? A star.
Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Christmas Eve!
Most annoying thing about this time of year? All the shops are too crowded and children singing Christmas carols in department stores are annoying as hell.
What I love most about Christmas? The happiness of it.What to do when you really don't get the jolly Christmas mood? Although I already have overused the word 'Christmas', opened the presents I got from my friends, eaten too much chocolate, sung Christmas carols in a church, eaten the yucky rice porridge, wished Merry Christmas to people and so on, I just don't feel like it's Christmas. Aaand I'm gonna blame the weather. I can't remember the last time we had a black Christmas in Finland especially because the last two winters were the coldest and snowiest ever. But this year on my way to church I noticed that the grass was still green. The people who travelled all the way to Canary Islands for Christmas, you really are wasting your money. It's just the same here in Finland, we're just missing the palms.

But I guess I will just have to cope with this. The world is changing, the climate is changing and the weather is unpredictable. The Christmas-y questions were copied from Anita's blog (follow her!!!). And I just want to wish you all Merry Christmas and I hope you have a great time. And don't forget to show your love to your friends and family ♥

House rules

Everywhere I look, there are signs of a struggle. The mail has been scattered all over the kitchen floor; the stools are overturned. The phone has been knocked off its pedestal, its battery pack hanging loose from an umbilicus of wires. There's one single faint footprint at the threshold of the living room, pointing toward the dead body of my son, Jacob.
  He is sprawled like a starfish in front of the fireplace. Blood covers his temple and his hands. For a moment, I can't move, can't breathe.
  Suddenly, he sits up. 'Mom,' Jacob says, 'you're not even trying.'
House Rules, Jodi Picoult

As you can see, I've begun reading a new book and fell in love with it. Today after school I was going through the books in our library and found something interesting by Jodi Picoult (again). Her books are A+ really, for example I read Nineteen Minutes in a few days 'cause it was too difficult to stop. The plot of House Rules is quite interesting, you should check it out!

When I came back home, there was a big envelope for me from Jemina! I was so surprised and had no idea that she'd send me a present, but the most amazing thing is that she gave me these rilakkuma post-its and I loooove rilakkuma. Ohmygawd I'm so happy, thank God for amazing people that actually exist. Go send her some love on her blog here! And uhm, the last photo is my first origami crane ever which I folded at school with our Japanese assistant teacher. Her origami skills were a little more advanced than mine but at least it looks like a bird yay.

Three more nights before Christmas eve. I'm rather enthusiastic.

I like your cuddles

This weekend has been sooo busy if you compare it to the other weekends of the past two months but I've enjoyed every minute. I spent the Friday night at my friend's place, played with their cats, suffered because I'm terribly allergic to them, cycled back home at half past one at night and fell asleep on my bed with my computer open, woke up at seven in the morning and noticed that I the computer had fallen on the floor, went back to sleep and slept until my little sister woke me up. I probably turn into some kind of a superhero at night because I cycled over 6 kilometers and it was cold. Yesterday evening I went to an other friend's house and she lives 8 kilometers away from me and it was snowing and I still only had my bike. What's wrong with me? But still, it was most lovely to spend time with them! ♥
Now I'm going to spoil myself with some greasy ass food and get some important Christmas things done. Two days of school and then I'm free for a moment!

I like it here beside you dear

you're even more than you appear

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity

Things to do in December:
1) Donate money for the people who need it. If you can buy a shit load of Christmas gifts, you can give two euros for a good cause. A good mood is guaranteed.
2) Fall down while walking to your school / workplace / anywhere. The icy roads will make this extremely easy, but be sure not to hurt yourself.
3) Drinking tea is a good thing to do in any month, but it's especially nice in December. Though I'm starting to like hot chocolate too, when it's served with whipped cream or something that makes it even more sweet and unhealthy (marshmallows are quite good).
4) Take photos of the snow falling because it'll melt away soon. Don't forget to complain about the weather even though last winter was -20 degrees celsius colder and not good either. Every time it's snowing, make a facebook status update filled with excitement or alternatively write something sarcastic about the "yay snow!!!" statuses because you're just too cool.
5) Don't clean your room before the 22nd day because you will mess it up anyways. I'm totally saving all this mess later because cleaning up twice before Christmas would be a pain in the ass and I have better things to do (a lie).

So yeah, I'm feeling the most uninspired and nothing makes me excited at the moment. Ok, that's also a lie. Today I was buying Christmas presents and sending packages for my penpals and got quite excited because I saw these Moomin stickers ~random crazy bitch xD~. But seriously, I'm so tired.

Me just bein Miley taking photos of myself after shower.

i think i'm breaking down again

An old-fashioned photo spam. Haven't done this in ages. Or actually, I'm not sure if I have ever posted this many photos at one time.

For the past week I've been the worst blogger ever but I haven't felt like posting since I haven't been doing anything. The school has been nothing special and I'm not that interested in any of the subjects I'm studying this period. I only have motivation for Japanese but the lessons are always so late that I'm super tired during them and I'm not sure if I'll be able to learn that much... I don't know, this whole period is just uninteresting and boring, bleh.

On Thursday I received a letter from my new Japanese penpal who sent me the cutest post card ever. They send those when celebrating New Year but that one is last year's card I suppose. But the bunny and everything, so perfect! Fuck Santa Claus, I prefer adorable animals.

Today I went shopping with my family and bought a bunch of movies which we're going to watch later on today and tomorrow. Today we'll begin with Amélie which my sister hasn't seen yet, so it really is time for her to watch it. Yay ♥

the grass was so green against my new clothes

1, 2, 3, 4, 5

A few things I desperately need. Desperately. I have been Christmas shopping which is nice, I like to buy presents for my friends, but damn, I'm looking forward getting some high-quality gifts myself too! I would've wanted to buy a cd, a cardigan, a dvd and a cute notebook for myself but I couldn't because I wanted to be selfless and generous and a nice person. Ok, I'm quite excited because one of my friends is going to get the greatest present she has ever gotten ... at least the greates present she has ever got from me. Well, I would love it. And I also sent a package to the US which is hopefully still going to look like a Christmas present when it arrives to my penpal's home. Fingers crossed.

I've been chatting with Jemina about iPhone cases 'cause that lucky girl is getting one of those phones and you know that when you get an iPhone, you have to get a case. She saw these couple cases which are absolutely adorable, amazing, perfect, the best thing ever, but I can't see myself buying them. You know, I'm missing the two important things you need for them; the other person of a couple and an iPhone. Life is so hard at times.

Any advice for a boy whose nokia-loving dad doesn't understand that happiness starts with a small i?

PS. Happy independence day Finland. You kinda suck, but I guess you're okay.
PPS. Send me an email if you want to exchange Christmas cards! Especially if you're living somewhere far away or just are the best person in the world.

She moves in her own way

Friday ♥ I've been studying for days now and it's nice to finally just sit down without panicking about anything. Today I went to town to eat some Chinese food and damn it was good! And the place was just recently renovated so it was super cool and cozy. Totally recommending Long Gong for everyone.

It feels extremely weird that it's already December because there still isn't snow in Finland. The last two winters were almost too snowy and cold but I don't think this is any better. No snow = no Christmas, that's just the way it is! I haven't even bought any Christmas presents because the event feels so far away. However, 22 days will pass quickly, I'm sure of that. And I'm even more sure that I'm going to be panic shopping just a couple days before Christmas eve.

Uh, these days have been so boring that I don't really have anything to write. But yeah, isn't my new beanie cute? My mum was shocked when she saw it, but don't worry, I won't be wearing it at school. I'm trying hard to stay normal.

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